*sigh*
Wow. A lot has happened in the three days since my last post. I don’t even know where to begin. Things around here are changing. Significantly changing.
To begin with I suppose, I shall give a history of a close friend. I’ve known this person, let’s call them from now on Isabella, for over ten years. Ever since we’ve been in the second/first grade. (There is a year difference between us school-wise. But we are only 4 days apart in actual age. I am younger, but a year ahead in school.) So, Isabella and I have been best friends ever since meeting in elementary. Isabella was like family, a sister. So, ever since I have been back in town, we have been hanging out. Nothing illegal, nothing bad, just hanging out. Making pizzas one night, movies another, a trip to the casino (a first for me)…just whatever we feel like doing. Well, Isabella used to live with her mom. Neither was happy and when she turned 18, Isabella decided to move in with her father. (Her parents have been divorced ever since Isabella was young.) Granted, her father is not the ideal parent and will never win Parent of the Year, but he is better for Isabella than her mother. He treats her like she is an adult and only really steps in when it is necessary. Meanwhile, the relationship with her mother has been growing and strengthening. Isabella can actually carry on a conversation with her mother without yelling 10 minutes into the phone call. Isabella’s mother has some mental issues (I do believe it is bi-polar that she will not take medication for) and I can completely understand why Isabella moved out. I would have done the same thing years before given the opportunity. The household where Isabella lived for 18 years was horrible. Fights, actual fist fights, yelling, tempers flaring, claws being released…it makes for a bad environment. Especially when the brother gets away with everything he wants. Isabella could walk into the room, the brother cries and blames Isabella when the mother questions what happened. No matter the evidence to the contrary, the mother believed the brother. Every time. So, I applaud Isabella for moving out when capable. It takes courage to stand up to one’s mother and be the only voice of honesty they hear.
That all said, the current situation with her father is not good either. He does smoke (and not cigarettes) and he has alcohol in the house. But, it is better than when she lived with her mother. I just wish my parents could see it. I know that I don’t know the whole story, but I do know more than either of them put together. And no matter, they should not be passing judgment. So, all this being said (or typed) the current situation with Isabella and myself is apparently affected by all of this. My mother sees fit to dislike, almost hate Isabella for moving out of her mother’s house, living with her father, not being in college at the moment, and all of my recent decisions are based on the fact that Isabella is a bad influence in my life. My father seems to not have as much dislike for Isabella, it almost seems like he is siding with my mother to get her on his good side (which is a different post all together) and in reality has no problem with me and Isabella being friends. My sister on the other hand, hates Isabella. It’s sad because they used to be really good friends a few years back. My sister doesn’t know what is going on in Isabella’s life at all, but she is just as judgmental as the rest of my family. It bothers me that they wait till after ten years of good friendship to start thinking differently about my friends. Or they just didn’t show it. Or maybe I was naive. There is no telling….
_____________________________________________
So, other than that, my life has been peachy. I am starting a new job next week. And the pay is great. I also am getting along with my mother…as long as two subjects are not mentioned, we are fine. The sad thing is, now I feel as though I cannot talk to her honestly and openly about most of my life. The majority of my daily life deals with these two things, and she doesn’t want to hear about it. I cannot even mention their names. And she won’t think enough of them as people to speak their names either. A big part of my world revolves around these two people, I am who I am due largely to learning things about myself through these people. And she won’t hear about them. It does sadden me to a point-but I also have taken the attitude of it’s her loss. If she wants to be that stubborn and blind about my world, then that is up to her. I cannot change it.
Leave a Reply