Category Archives: humor

Repost from Halloween 2012: Oh noes! Someone doesn’t like me!


I received this lengthy message from an ex-boyfriend’s older sister. Completely out of the blue, but funny nonetheless.

Courtney R.

Hey, well firstly I want to pre-amble this with reminding you that I have never been anything but nice to you. I have all our old archived convos (which I have kept private) and I played the roll of “girlfriend” several times.

Next I would like to say this, The reason I am bothering you, the reason I have bothered to even look, is because of some strange reddit activity that myself, Caleb and Ashley are experiencing. There has been a suspicion that it might be you. I directly asked random_person1 “Is this Kristin?” That pm was met with silence and random_person1 continued to have some escapades.

After that I decided it was time to find your facebook and ask you there, I have to admit that I honestly couldnt remember your last name. but I know I had old messages and went on a hunt to find them. Once found I went ahead and wasted an hour re-reading them out of curiosity. It was then that I discovered you had linked me to your blog.

I opened it in a new tab and finished reading out messages. I headed over to your facebook to send you a message and ask about the reddit thing and discover that to message you I must be friends with you. So I went to the blog.

I must tell you that I am being very honest when I say that I am also a blogger on wordpress and I honestly thought you would have and email or some way to privately contact you there.

Then I read the first post and forgot to look for an email contact. I read all the way back to May 21, 2010.

I want to say this first. I feel so deeply for you and I understand the mess of emotions you have walked through, Bill and I have put in 9 years and this shit is still a mess.

I also want to say that I am aware of Calebs exploration with men. So your post, and the posts after did not shock me.

They made me angry, especially the post of the conversation that you clearly stole. Especially the post that was an email to you that he even said in the email should be kept private. Especially the fist post, because you are still talking about him and have made it clear how not over him you are…

I am asking you nicely, pull down those posts, I would be pissed if someone tried to censor me on my blog. I’d be pissed if some asshole walked in and asked me to pull down posts. But here I am asking you all the same. The posts were not your place to share. The posts were immature and have given you a crazy side that Caleb never told me about. It makes you look nuts…

I have lost a lot of respect for you after seeing your blog. Not that you cared about having my respect in the first place. But I did have a lot of respect for you, because as far as I knew you had walked through a hell of a fire, and you had come out on the other side mostly ok… I was wrong.

Thats alll I am gonna say about the blog for now. Hopefully its enough. The next thing I want to talk about is reddit. In all honesty I am not entirely sure that random_person1 is you. It seems that it could be you, but I feel it could be someone else.

If it is you, first I want to say this, Ouch, the comment on my 2 month old picture was uncalled for and hurtful. I am dealing with a lot of self esteem issues and that didn’t help. I also want to say this, trolling Caleb and Ashley’s posts and being awful is not helping you at all. It annoys all of us. It honestly takes away money from my household. Its stupid.

Lest thing I want to touch on in this message is this. I saw your other blog.. the strictly pepper one, obviously you know that it says “does it make you mad?” I had no idea what that was about so I asked Caleb, he explained and I went and looked for myself…. Kristin I don’t even know what to say. That is such a shit move. There are so many better moves. That one is just shit… and again it make you look a little crazy.

I know this has been long and you probably didn’t want to read any of it. But I hope that you might understand what I am trying to say and maybe even see that I am not trying to be cruel. I am trying to help you and at the same time protect my brother.

Thanks for your time…

Courtney

Kristin M.

I have to go to work, but I will respond to this at a later time.

///later////

No matter what kind of response I give here, none of you three would believe me. So, I’ll be as honest as I can with regards to this extremely lengthy message.

Reddit: I haven’t been on that particular site in quite some time. I do not have an account by that name. And I don’t know why any of you would suspect it is me. If you are that paranoid, I’m sure they make medication for it.

Finding me on Facebook: Thank you for ensuring that I knew you didn’t know the name of the girl who watched your kids and talked with you about very personal situations and that it was a waste. However, I am not the least bit upset about this. And this seems to be a waste of time and space for you to tell me.

You and Bill: This, again, seems to be a waste of space.

My posts: My disclaimer, if you would read carefully, does indeed say that I post for me, not for anyone else. And I will not censor my blog. If it makes you angry, I suggest you don’t read it.

Also, the time I spent with/talking to Caleb and the consequences from that are a very big part of my life. I shouldn’t have to explain to you of all people the effects of being cheated on multiple times and the obvious lies I was repeatedly told. I am not hung up on Caleb, so please for the love of God, stop thinking that. I am dealing with the consequences of loving the bastard years ago.

My crazy: He must have you totally convinced that I could not be a normal girl who gave him everything only to be lied to, cheated on, used and abused. But it makes no difference to me what you believe about me.

Respect: No. I have no concerns about what respect you have for me or ever have had. I have no respect for you either. So, I guess we are even.

Reddit again: Why would I have anything to say to you? what would my motives be in stalking you on that silly site? And if you are making money off that site and are that concerned about losing it, I seriously suggest getting a real job and stop taking advantage of the stupid people in the world.

Blog again: That was done over a year ago. It was out of spite and if you don’t like it, then don’t read it. That site was put up over a year ago. Get over it.

You are not concerned about being cruel in this, but thanks for trying to “be kind” to me. And your brother is a big(-ish) boy, he should be able to take care of himself. Otherwise, it’s time to grow up. For all of you.

Courtney R.

You clearly missed the entirety of my message. Thank you for taking the time to read and reply anyway.

Kristin M.

Be sure to check out the blog again. =)

Courtney R.

See. This is bitterness…. Just bitterness and I haven’t even read it. I didn’t insult you. I wasn’t hateful. Its hard to judge through a message when there isn’t facial expression and auditory aid. I haven’t even checked it. I still see how you are working. And for the record, I know 5 Kristins, I didn’t recall your last name, and I also don’t recall you watching my kids. I wish you had been better able to understand me. I won’t bother you again.

Kristin M.

You didn’t know my name before yesterday, you don’t remember me watching your children, you don’t know me. So please, so thinking you do.

Courtney R.

Lol, when did I ever say that I did know, and of COURSE I knew your name. Duh! I seriously do not recall you watching my kids. Why are you continuing this? I told you that I wouldn’t bother you again. I don’t have a desire to have an argument with you. And now you are putting words in my mouth. Leave it be. I have said me piece. You have every right not to listen to it. I understand that. I won’t argue that with you. You CLEARLY aren’t getting me and are on the defensive.

Kristin M.

As much fun as this is, my dear, I must bid you adieu. Some of us are bettering ourselves with an education.

Courtney R.

oh, I gotta say this one last thing though, Did you know that my youngest son has been diagnosed with Autism and thats why I don’t work? Did you know that I am living in this shit hole and living on next to nothing because the boys dad tazered one of them and so I left him and now he ISN’T paying child support? Don’t judge people before you know their story. I reserved judgement for you on the parts I didn’t know and didn’t tear into you like I wanted to you because I know what you went through. You are so bitter.

///blocked///

Now, let’s assume I care about what she/they think of me or them in general and try to logic our way through this.
It is my impression that I was contacted initially for the Reddit scandal, but the message was more or less attacking me for sharing conversations that are from years ago. Anyone have any idea how that matters now? You’re right. It doesn’t. Most of what she is talking about is from 2010, and the email I received that I posted was from early 2011. If you want to bring up the past, then make sure you are ready for it. There’s heaps more I haven’t shared here. Go ahead and piss me off again. It’s funny to me to see how people squirm when the truth they have so desperately tried to hide comes to light.
Side note: if I am still in your thoughts, I’m living rent free in your head. Thanks for that. ^_^
I honestly have no idea what Reddit thing is happening, and again, I don’t care. But, food for thought here: if one person can threaten your “business”, maybe you should have stayed in school and/or paid more attention and you would have a better “business” now. Just sayin’…
As to the last message you sent, I cannot begin to describe the amount of a shit I do not give. YOU put yourself in that situation. YOU haven’t had the balls to move on (and you want to talk to me about being pathetic?). YOU are not being smart about your kids. YOU are going to have to deal with it because YOU are alone. And finally, YOU are not part of my life and I don’t care about your struggles.

Though, I do have to wonder. If my blog and all those conversations were part of your discussion, are they still a problem for the two of them? Does someone else get the annoying, gut-wrenching feeling of him not being satisfied with her? Is someone else, who is supposedly SOOOO hot and awesome to be around, having doubts about his fidelity? I’M not the problem with the relationship. Maybe it’s his past or his lack of conscious. I’d bet money that there have been arguments or fights over the lies and the supposed inability to understand why she is upset and uneasy when he brings up or brings over female friends. Once a cheater, always a cheater. And you can substitute “bastard” or “liar” or “asswipe” or whatever tickles your fancy there. 

Thank you for giving me my costume for today. I will go around pretending to be someone who gives a shit about you and what you think. And it works because I really, honestly, completely, whole-heartedly, with all my being do NOT give a shit about any of you or what you think.

And thanks for the inspiration to write again. =)

Repost from 2011: 04112011- I lied…


Me: How upset are you that nothing happened on Friday? 5:03 PM

Caleb?: : Uh, not at all? I feel like there was just something i might have been missing, something that we all might understand soon, maybe. I didnt know what to expect, but im still paying attention… Why? 5:38 PM

Me: Just curious. I mean, the lights that happened that week and the earthquakes and shit. And then nothing on Friday. It almost feels like a let down. 5:39 PM

Caleb?: But the second things happen and when we find out about them can be different… What if on that day an alien race gave our goverments an ultimatum? Or anything like that? Ive felt more since then too- felt like thoughts have been more complete, and dreams have been more frequent, I dunno, still waitin to grow some more 5:48 PM

Me: You believe in aliens now? I mean, I’m not saying they don’t, but from a realistic point of view, I don’t see how they can and we don’t know already. 5:50 PM

Me: Probably not what I was supposed to focus on, but whatever. LOL. 5:51 PM

Caleb?: Youre gonna just have to roll with me on the alien thing. too long a story. 6:05 PM

Me: I’m slightly intrigued. 6:06 PM

Caleb?: I’ve definitely explained enough craziness to enough people lately to go into all that. 6:09 PM

Me: I wasn’t asking for an explanation. I was just saying. 6:09 PM

Caleb?: I understand. 6:25 PM

Me: Anyway, thanks. 6:26 PM

Caleb?: Why did ya wonder? 6:28 PM

Me: Eh? 6:28 PM

Caleb?: Whyd you ask 6:29 PM

Me: Oh. I’m not sure. I guess because you were the one who told me about it and you were so into it. It was your new Australia almost. 6:30 PM

Caleb?: You were right when you said I’d lost my drive. You nailed it. 6:37 PM

Me: I know. 6:37 PM

Caleb?: I’m glad. It was a drive fed by my ability to fuck with people. And it rode on the same resource. 6:48 PM

Caleb?: It was pure ego. 6:50 PM

Me: Yeah, but you did more than anyone else when you had it. Seems like you are more stationary without it. In all aspects… 6:52 PM

Caleb?: I definitely am. I hate it. 6:52 PM

Me: Why not change it? 6:53 PM

Caleb?: This is what a conflicted person does. And the drive was more external than innate. 6:54 PM

Me: You think so? What was different before? 6:55 PM

Caleb?: Different company. 6:55 PM

Me: Jess? Alyssa? Me? 6:56 PM

Me: Ryan? 6:56 PM

Caleb?: Not anyone that was removed. It’s the company since added. 6:57 PM

Me: Ashley? Really? 6:58 PM

Caleb?: It was gone before she and I got together. 7:04 PM

Me: Jd? I’m curious and I don’t know why… 7:05 PM

Caleb?: I don’t know… but I’m only certain enough of anything to say that it’s related to the change of people around me. 7:06 PM

Me: Uh huh… 7:07 PM

Caleb?: Have you ever had an actual conversation with Ashley? Ever? 7:09 PM

Me: Other than the Facebook stuff, no. Why would I? 7:10 PM

Caleb?: You clearly wouldn’t. 7:11 PM

Me: So why ask? 7:11 PM

Caleb?: Because I’d love like nothing else to see that happen. 7:12 PM

Me: Why? 7:12 PM

Caleb?: Because I’m a sucker for people confronting things that get to them most. Small part of the drive that still lingers. 7:13 PM

Me: I don’t get to her. So what would that accomplish? 7:15 PM

Caleb?: Wouldn’t be for her. 7:17 PM

Me: What am I supposed to get out of it? 7:18 PM

Caleb?: Would be for you either, kiddo. 7:18 PM

Me: Are you serious? 7:19 PM

Caleb?: Well yeah. 7:24 PM

Me: Tell you what, next time you are in Fayetown, we’ll all get high and talk. 7:27 PM

Caleb?: I think if the three of us all got together in the same room the world would actually have to end. 7:30 PM

Me: Why is that? 7:32 PM

Caleb?: Because we’d all be different people than the people that we are. I’d have to be excluded. 7:34 PM

Me: I thought you couldn’t handle fakeness when high. Wouldn’t that be better? 7:35 PM

Caleb?: Not about fakeness. You two are from different planets. You’d need me out of the way to figure out what language you’d use. If I were there I’d be transl 7:38 PM

Caleb?: ating, and I’d be terrible at it. 7:38 PM

Me: Pfft. Like I’d let you translate for me. 7:39 PM

Caleb?: If I wanted it to happen, it’d happen. Both both those reasons I’d have to be out of the room. 7:41 PM

Me: No. You wouldn’t get to decide everything if I were there. 7:42 PM

Caleb?: You’re already behind on this analogy. Don’t worry about it. It will definitely never happen. 7:44 PM

Me: I know. Which is why I didn’t care to keep up. 7:44 PM